Épisode Complètement GaGa S01E20 - Glee Saison 1

Will et Tina sont convoqués chez Figgins. Il les a convoqués à cause du look gothique de Tina. Il dit qu'à cause des films Twilight les ados ont changé leur comportement. Il rapporte que la veille, des éléves ont agressé Jacob habillé comme des vampires avec marqués "Team Edward" sur le T-Shirt. Will dit à Figgins que les vampires n'existent pas. Tina se défend en disant qu'elle nre regarde pas Twilight. Figgins ordonne à Tina de changer de look sinon elle sera suspendue. 

Carole, la mère de Finn, lui fait descendre un escalier et lui dit qu'il y a une surprise. Burt et Kurt ont préparé un petit buffet avec une banderole "Bienvenue". Carole explique que Burt lui a demandé d'emménager avec eux. Finn n'est pas d'accord. Burt lui offre à manger. Carole dit que c'est plus grand que chez eux, qu'il y a deux salles de bains. Mais Finn ne veut pas des crudités, ni 2 salles de bain, il veut juste retrouver sa maison. Kurt lui annonce qu'il devront partager la chambre. Mais Finn ne veut pas. Sa mère lui dit qu'il s'y habituera et Burt fera une chambre à l'étage.

A la répétition, Tina est vétu d'un pull. Tout le monde trouve que c'est bizarre et lui propose d'autre look. Rachel arrive et annonce qu'ils ont un gros prolème : elle a espionné les Vocal Adrénaline et trouvé 18 boites d'ampoules vide de Noël, elle a demandé une certaine dentelle et il n'en avait plus. Will ne comprend pas, les élèves comprennent que les Vocal Adrénaline font du Lady Gaga. Ils accusent le coup. Will trouve une idée qui pourrait donner un nouveau look à Tina et d'être compétitifs. Le devoir de la semiane est sur Lady Gaga.

Les Vocal Adrénaline dansent comme Lady Gaga dans une combinaison rouge. Mercedes, Quinn et Rachel viennent les espionnées. Shelby dit à sa chorale qui laissent faire aux costumes tout le travail. Il faut qu'ils soient plus dans la théâtralité. Pour le montrer, elle chante "Funny Girl". Pendant la chanson, Rachel se lève et descend vers la scène. A la fin de la chanson, elle interpèle Shelby et lui dit qu'elle est sa fille.

Elles discutent. Rachel lui demande si elle l'a regretté, Shelby lui dit que oui. Elle lui dit qu'elle a reconnu au municipale, qu'elle lui ressemblait. Rachel voudrait savoir ca n'a pas était durque son rêve d'être une étoile ne se réalise pas. Shelby dit que c'est comme une promesse brisée. Rachel déclare qu'elles ont la même théâtralité, que la façon dont elles sont assises sont dramatiques mais qu'elles sont à l'aise. Shelby pense qu'elles n'auraient pas du se rencontrer, qu'elles étaient censé tomber dans les bras l'une de l'autre. Rachel lui propose d'aller manger. Shelby est désolée, elle l'appellera.

Finn va voir Will qui cherche des informations sur Lady Gaga, il est impréssionné par ce quelle a fait. Finn voulait justement lui parler de ça, aucun garçon à part Kurt ne veulent le faire. Il pense que le Glee Club fait toujours ce que les filles veulent. Will est d'accord, il n'a peut-être pas assez écouter les garçons, qu'il faut trouver une solution. Finn en a déja une. 

Puck et Quinn parlent. Puck veut qu'elle appelle leur fill Jack Daniels. Quinn dit que c'est une fille. Puck repond alors Jackie Daniels. Quinn lui dit que ca ne sert à rien, que de toute façon, elle donnera le bébé.

Tina et Kurt sont dans les couloirs. Tina est habillé avec des bulles en plastique, Kurt dans un costume . Deux gars de l'équipe de foot les bousculent. Kurt leur demande s'ils ont perdu la tête. Ils leur demandent s'il a un problème. Kurt leur disent qu'ils peuvent le frapper mais pas les filles. Ils disent qu'en ce moment ils ne font pas de différence avec lui et qu'ils s'habillent bizarrement. Kurt leur dit qu'ils montrent qu'ils sont réellement et que c'est exactement pareil avec leur uniforme de foot. L'un des footballeurs lui dit que la prochaine fois son poing s'écrasera dans sa machoire.

C'est l'heure de la répétition. Les filles sont en costume. Will leur dit que les costumes représentent une partie de leur personnalité. Puck demande où est Rachel. Mercedes leur annonce que la veille, elles ont appris que Shelby ést la mère de Rachel. Artie pense que c'est foutu et Puck pense qu'elle va partir pour Vocal Adrénaline. Rachel arrive est dit que non, elle n'ira pas. Son costume est fait de peluches pour son enfance ratée. Une peluche tombe et Rachel dit qu'elle les a agrafées. Will dit que les filles et Kurt peuvent chanter leur chanson. Ils interprètent "Bad Romance".

Finn est dans les toilettes des garçons. Il se fait des traits au marqueur pour le Glee Club. Les deux gars du foot arrivent et lui demandent s'il se maquille. L'un d'eux dit qu'il est devenu gai depuis qu'il a emménagé avec Kurt. Finn dit que c'est pour la chorale. Ils lui répétent alors que le fait d'être au Glee Club et dans l'équipe de foot le rend bisexuel.

Rachel va aux répétitions des Vocal Adrénaline pour voir sa mère. Celle-ci lui de cesser de venir en douce. Rachel lui montre son costume et lui que ses pères ne savent pas coudre, qu'elle a besoin d'une mère. Elle lui demande de l'aider.

Elle arrive à l'auditorium dans un nouveau costume. C'est sa mère qui l'a fait. Les garçons se mettent à chanter "Shout it loud". Les filles applaudissent.

Dans les couloirs, Kurt et Tina discutent de l'interprétation des garçons sur KISS. Ils tombent alors sur les deux gars de l'équipe de foot. Ils disent que Gaga doit disparaître.

Kurt et Finn sont chez eux. Kurt répare son costume et Finn se démaquille. Kurt voudrait que Finn demande aux gars du foot d'arrêté de le harceler. Finn dit qu'ils croient qu'ils sont en couple. Kurt s'en fiche mais Finn dit qu'il n'a pas que ces deux-là, qu'ils habitent dans l'Ohio. Il ne comprend pas pourquoi Kurt doit s'habiller comme ça et il dit qu'il devrait plus s'intégrer. Kurt réplique que ça serait plus facile pour lui. Il le regarde se démaquiller avec peine et veut l'aider mais Finn lui dit de ne pas le toucher.

Shelby est dans le bureau de Will. Elle dit que le fait qu'elle voit Rachel n'est pas pour nuire à la chorale. Will dit que ce n'est pas pour ça, c'est pour Rachel elle même, elle n'est pas aussi dure que sa mère. Elle est fragile, émotive, qu'elle tient à cette rencontre avec elle mais il n'est pas sur que ça soit pareil pour Shelby. Qu'elle ne tient pas à avoir une fille adolescente. Shelby explique qu'elle ne peut plus avoir d'enfant mais qu'elle voulait une fille. C'est pour ça qu'elle à chercher à rencontrer Rachel. Will a raison, elle voulait ravoir son bébé, pas une fille presque adulte.

Kurt montre à Finn leur chambre redécorée. Finn n'a pas l'air très heureux. Il lui demande s'il est fou et a quoi sert un objet. Kurt dit que c'est une cloison. Finn lui dit qu'il ne veut pas s'habiller devant lui car il a remarqué que  Kurt le dragué. Kurt lui dit que ce n'est qu'une chambre, qu'ils vont la redécorer. Finn veut virer tout de suite des objets de "tapette". Burt arrive est demande comme il a appelé Krt. Finn se défend en disant qu'il parlait des couvertures. Burt dit que comme il utilise ce mot, il s'attaque à Kurt. Finn ne voulait pas le dire mais Burt pense que si. Il dit que Finn doit quitter la maison même s'il aime sa mère mais que sa famille passe en première.

En répétition, Puck voudrait dire quelque chose à Quinn et il veut que tout le monde l'entende. Il parle de son père qui n'était jamais là et que lui s'en fichais qu'il rock tout le temps, il voulais juste qu'il soit là. Il lui dit que Jack Daniels est un bon nom pour une barque mais pas pour une petite fille. Il demande alors aux garçons qui ont chanté KISS de venir l'aider. Ils chantent alors "Beth". Quand c'est fini, Puck demande à Quinn d'appeler leur fille Beth et de lui permettre d'être la quand elle accouchera. Quinn est d'accord.

Rachel est à l'auditorium, Shely arrive. Rachel sais pourquoi elle est là, pour dire au revoir. Shelby voulait que ca marche mais qu'il est trop tard pour partager des choses. Rachel ne comprend pas, elle est triste et devrait tomber dans les bras de sa mère mais elle ne le sens pas. Shelby pense que c'est parce qu'elle est sa mère, pas sa maman. Rachel veut savoir si elles vont faire comme si elles ne se connaissaient pas. Shelby dit que non, que pour le moment elles seront reconnaissantes l'une envers l'autre. Puis elles se prennent dans les bras. Shelby lui offre alors un verre avec une étoile en or dessus. Avant de partir, Rachel veut qu'elles chantent en duo. SHelby acceptent et elles chantent "Poker Face". Puis Shelby s'en va en disant qu'elle est une bonne chanteuse.

Will rentre dans la salle de répétition et demande pourquoi ils sont tous en costumes. Artie dit qu'ils espèraient la leçon de la semaine. Mais Will ne sais pas quoi dire, Tina dit qu'elle sais. Elle est vêtu en gothique et ne veut pas être habillé autrement. Elle a joué un tour à Figgins en lui faisant croire que son père est le roi des vampires asiatiques. Artie se rend compte que Finn et Kurt ne sont pas là.

Les gars de l'équipe de foot ont attrapé Kurt. Celui-ci dit qu'ils peuvent les frapper mais qu'il ne changera pas. Finn apparait costumé et dit qu'ils ne le frappera pas. Que s'il est habillé dans un rideau de douche c'est pour lui et que personne ne le frappera. Les gars disent qu'ils peuvent s'occuper des deux. La chorale arrive et demande s'ils peuvent s'occuper d'exu tous; Les gars promettent de revenir avec le reste de l'équipe. Rachel en a marre qu'on les traite de monstres mais Mercedes lui de les regarder qu'ils le sont. Finn dit qu'ils le sont tous ensembles. Will arrive et applaudit et pense que c'est la leçon à retenir. Il leur dit qu'ils vont se remettre au travail.

Scene 1 - Figgin's Office - Figgins,Tina,Will

 

Tina is dressed in total goth look and Figgins look at her with rage in his eyes.

 

Tina : Am I in trouble?

 

Will : Come on. You've got more self-esteem than that. I think this might have something to do with your perfect attendance last semester.

 

Figgins : No. Miss Cohen-Chang is in trouble. It has come to my attention that the look you sport is what is known as goth.American teens are coming down with a serious case of Twilight fever,transformed from normal children into vampires obsessed with the occult. And only yesterday,this dark specter reared its head at McKinley High.

 

Flash Back - Lockers-Lauren and a clique of « Team Edward and Jacob »,Jacob Ben Israel

 

Some girls are in front of the lockers with Team Edward and Team Jacob T-shirts.

 

Lauren : This is totally going to get Robert Pattinson's attention.

 

Hissing

 

Jacob : Oh, hey. (Girls roaring and screaming jump on him) Oh, dear God!

 

End of Flash Back

 

Will : I don't mean to state the obvious,but you do know that vampires aren't real, right ? They don't exist.

 

Figgins : William, denial will not make this problem go away !

 

Tina : My parents won't even let me watch Twilight. My mom says she thinks Kristin Stewart seems like a bitch.

 

Figgins : This is a serious problem ! Miss Cohen-Chang, you've got to find yourself another style of dress !

 

Will : Hold on a second. Tina is shy and one way she's found to express herself is through her clothes. High school is an incredibly important time when kids get to explore who they are. When I was in high school, I had a whole year where I dressed exactly like Kurt Cobain. I mean, come on. There has to be someone who you used to dress like.

 

Figgins : Yes. For several years in my early 20s, I dressed up as Elvis.But he was a Christian, Will ! And he did not possess the ability to transform into a bat !

 

Will (whispering to Tina) : I think he thinks vampires are real.

 

Tina : I think you're right.

 

Figgins : Studies have shown that a strict dress code fosters a safe and stable learning environment with fewer instances of gang violence and vampirism. So, if I see you dressed in lacy demon clothes again, Tina Cohen-Chang, (pounds desk) You will be suspended !

 

Scene 2 - Hummel's House Basement - Burt,Carole,Finn,Kurt

 

Carole : Step. Couple more.

 

Finn : Is there a car down here from me ?

 

Carole : Honey, we're indoors.

 

Finn : Oh. Okay.

 

Carole : And open your eyes.

 

Kurt : Sparkling cider ?

 

Carole : Yeah.

 

Finn : "Welcome home" ? But who went somewhere ?

 

Carole : Burt asked us to move in with them.

 

Finn : And this is how you're telling me ?

 

Kurt : The party is my idea. If you're gonna say something, say it loud, right?

 

Burt : Yeah. It's gonna take some getting used to, but trust me, you're gonna love it,okay ? Now you don't have to drag your tail over here every time you want to watch something on the old 55-incher. We got a lot of food - some ethnic food. It's some ethnicity, that's not ours.

 

Kurt : Tuna crudité. Tuna crudité. It's not ethnic.

 

Burt : Here you go.

 

Carole : Finn, this house is twice as big as ours. It has two bathrooms.

 

Burt : Two and a half.

 

Finn : I don't want an extra bathroom or a tuna crude. I just want my house back.

 

Kurt : I think I know what this resistance is about. Our room. And I couldn't agree more. The palate in here is totally unflattering to your skin tone. Not everyone can pull off Dior gray. We need to redecorate.

 

Finn : Wait, we're sharing a room ? I'm not cool with that !

 

Carole : Baby, I know it's weird, okay ? But can't be much of a surprise. And, in time, you're gonna be as happy as I am.

 

Burt : Yeah, look, I'll knock out a wall upstairs, I'll put an addition on, okay ? But-but until then, maybe this will grease the wheels a bit, huh ? (He takes a 300 bill out and givex it to Finn but Kurt takex it before Finn can react) Hey. Look, that's 300. Have at it. You redecorate this place.

 

Kurt : Don't worry, roomie. Mr. Ikea Catalog and I will have this all figured out. I am going to put together a palate that expresses who you are and who I want you to be.

Who you want to be.

 

Burt : Hey, what night's game night ? You play Sorry ?

 

Carole : You know...

 

Kurt : He will now.

 

Burt : I will beat you.

 

Scene 3 – Choir Room – All the Glee Club and Mr Schue

 

Tina changed her look and wears a jogging that looks like pajamas.

 

Artie : It's so weird.

 

Finn : This so isn't you.

 

Tina : I feel like an Asian Branch Davidian.

 

Will : Tina, are there any other looks you can try?

 

Santana : Biker chick ? (Tina puts her thumb down showing she doesn't agree)

 

Finn : Cowgirl?

 

Mercedes : Hood rat.

 

Quinn : Computer programmer.

 

Britanny : Cross-country skier.

 

Puck : Catholic schoolgirl.

 

Britanny : Happy Meal, no onions. Or a chicken.

 

Tina : Look, I appreciate it, guys,but it just isn't me. I know who I am, and I'm not allowed to show it. It's like communism.

 

Rachel (showing up in the room) : Guys, we have a serious problem. You know how I've been doing some deep background on Vocal Adrenaline ?

 

Artie : Isn't that against the rules ?

 

Rachel : No, not at all. Or probably. Whatever ! Anyway, what I figured out; I rooted through the Dumpsters behind the Carmel auditorium and I found 18 empty boxes

of Christmas lights.

 

Tina : Oh, no.

 

Rachel : Which led me to Joelle Fabrics. I asked them about red Chantilly lace. They were sold out.

 

Mercedes : Oh, sweet Jesus.

 

Kurt : Oh, my.

 

Will : Wait, what?

 

Kurt : They're doing Gaga.

 

Mercedes : That's it. It's over.

 

Rachel : Exactly.

 

Kurt : We should have guessed it. They're going for full-out theatricality. They know it's the easiest way to beat us. Damn them.

 

Puck : What's up with this Gaga dude ? He just, like, dresses weird,right ? Like Bowie ?

 

Rachel scoffs

 

Kurt (aggresive to Puck) : Lady Gaga is a woman. She's only the biggest pop act to come along in decades. She's boundary-pushing, the most theatrical performer of our generation. And she changes her look faster than Brit changes sexual partners.

 

Britanny : That's true.

 

Artie : It makes sense that Vocal Adrenaline would pay homage. It's a brilliant move.

She's a perfect fit for them.

 

Will : Hold on a second. We might be able to kill two birds with one stone here. We can help Tina find a new look and find a competitive number for regionals. This week, your assignment : Gaga.

 

The girls and Kurt are gasping and murmuring,the guys don't seem as happy as them of the week challenge

 

Rachel : Pens, we need pens. My ideas just come to me.

 

Will : Uh, my office. Right there.

 

Rachel : I'm brainstorming. It's coming.

 

Scene 4–Carmel High Auditorium-Vocal Adrenaline,Shelby,Rachel,Quinn,Mercedes

 

Vocal Adrenaline are in rehearsal while Quinn Mercedes and Rachel are spying them.

 

Shelby : And claw, claw, uh, clap, clap. And five, six, seven, eight. One, two, three, four...

 

Mercedes : Think they can see us ?

 

Quinn (whispering) : If they catch us, are we gonna have to go to jail ?

 

Rachel (whispering) : Stealing their ideas is not a crime.

 

Shelby : ...Six, seven, eight. And one, two...

 

Rachel (whispering) : Your shoes are making noise.

 

Shelby : ...And five, six, seven, eight. And one, two, three, four, five, six and seven...

 

Rachel : They look amazing.

 

Shelby : ...Claw, claw, uh, clap, clap. And five, six- uh, uh... Okay, okay, okay, just... enough. You guys aren't getting it. You're letting the costumes do all the work. Theatricality isn't about crazy outfits. It's not enough to douse yourselves with gasoline. You have to light yourselves on fire to make it work.

 

Rachel : God, she's good.

 

Shelby : But being theatrical doesn't mean you have to be a nuclear explosion. It can be like, like a quiet storm. You just have to radiate emotion,express what's deep inside you. That's what theatricality is truly about. Do I have to demonstrate ? "Funny Girl", E flat.

 

Rachel : Exactly what I would have done : Barbra. I could do it in my sleep.

 

Funny Girl

 

Rachel recognizes her birth mom's voice, she gets up and goes to the stage.

 

Mercedes : Where are you going ?

 

Quinn : Get back here.

 

Shelby finishes the song and Rachel calls to her

 

Rachel : Ms. Corcoran ? I'm Rachel Berry, I'm your daughter.

 

Both of them are sitting in the bleachers.

 

Rachel : Did you ever regret it?

 

Shelby : Yes. Then no. Then so much.

 

Rachel : W-When did you realize it was the right time for me to find you ?

 

Shelby (chuckles) : I saw you sing at sectionals. You were extraordinary. You were me.

(chuckles)

 

Rachel : Was it hard for you to not become a star ? To not have your dreams come true ?

 

Shelby : It felt like a broken promise. Like the Fisher King's wound - never heals.

 

Rachel : Wow. Genetics really are amazing. You see the world with the same fierce theatricality as I do. Even the way we're sitting right now is so dramatic, and yet we feel so comfortable with it.

 

Shelby : I've missed so much. How do you feel ?

 

Rachel : Thirsty. When I was little and I used to get sad,my dads would bring me a glass of water. It got so I couldn't tell if I was sad or just thirsty.

 

Shelby : I shouldn't have done this. This was supposed to feel good. W-We were supposed to have some kind of slow-motion run into each other's arms. This is all wrong.

 

Rachel : Maybe we can just go to dinner or something just to get over the initial shock.

 

Shelby : I'm so sorry, Rachel. Uh... I'll... I'll call you.

 

Scene 5 - Will's Office – Will, Finn

 

Will : Oh, hey, Finn, come on in. I'm learning all this amazing stuff about Lady Gaga. She's got this thing called the "Haus of Gaga" which is like this collective of artists

and designers who collaborate on, on her styles and stage sets and her music. I think it's an exciting model for what we could be doing in Glee Club.

 

Finn : Yeah, that's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about. I don't want to do Lady Gaga. And I suspect that... with the exception of Kurt... that none of the other guys

are gonna want to do it either. I just feel like we're always doing whatever the girls want us to do.

 

Will : Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Maybe I haven't been listening to you guys hard enough. So let's find a solution.

 

Finn : Well, I, uh, I actually already have one.

 

Scene 6 - Corridor - Quinn, Puck, Tina, Kurt, Karofsky, Azimio

 

Puck : You're wrong. It's a really good name. It's a rock star name.

 

Quinn : You want to name our daughter"Jack Daniels" ? She's a girl !

 

Puck : Okay, fine, whatever. Jackie Daniels.

 

Quinn : The name is not the point. I told you this. I'm giving up the baby so I don't have to do this with you. This is good for you. Now you can go off and be a rock star yourself.

 

Tina : I love wearing champagne bubbles ! I get to express a whole different side of myself ! Because even though I'm painfully shy and obsessed with death, I'm a really effervescent person.

 

Karofski and Azimio push them against the lockers but Kurt disagrees.

 

Kurt : Excuse me ! Were you dropped on your heads ? !

 

Karofsky : What was that ?

 

Kurt : I think you heard me. I'm just saying. Pick on me - that's fine - but don't throw around a girl.

 

Azimio : Well, you know, lately, we haven't been able to tell the difference. We're not gaga for Gaga.

 

Karofsky : You dress all freaky, and then you rub it in everybody's faces. I don't want to look at it all day ! It's weird. It makes my eyes tired.

 

Azimio : If you want to switch it up a bit, just go from Gap to Banana Republic.

 

Kurt : It's called being theatrical. We're showing off who you are. It's the same thing you do when you go to school with your football uniforms on. You're expressing yourself, and we have every right to do the same.

 

Azimio : Well, you know what ? The next time you want to express yourself a little like a circus freak, don't be shocked when my fist (shocks the locker with his fist) feels like expressing itself against your chin ! Okay ? Knock that crazy fool crepe-paper nonsense offa you.

 

Karofsky : Let's go.

 

Kurt : Yeah, you don't want to be late for your appointment at Supercuts!

 

Azimio : Watch your mouth, Hummel !

 

Karofsky : And you know what, fancy ? You don't need an appointment at Supercuts.

They love walk-ins.

 

(They both chortle, the school bell rings)

 

Scene 7 - Choir Room - All the club and Will

 

Will : Little monsters, take a bow. (He laughs, applauses) All right ! Ladies, Kurt, I am

really, really impressed. Sientete. You know, you know what the best part is ? Each one of those costumes shows off a different aspect of your personalities.

 

Puck : Wait. Where's Rachel ? I mean, I only noticed because, like five minutes have

without her saying something totally obnoxious.

 

Mercedes : Rachel kinda got some intense news yesterday.

 

Quinn : We were spying on Vocal Adrenaline, and...

 

Will (cuting her) : You guys, that's not fair ! You gotta stop doing that. But, uh, you know, what, what'd you find out?

 

Mercedes : Okay, y'all ready ? Miss Corcoran, their coach ? She's Rachel's mom.

 

Will : Are you serious?

 

Artie : Way to bury the lead, Mercedes.

 

Puck : We're screwed. Rachel's gonna jump ship over to Vocal Adrenaline.

 

Rachel : Never ! I really don't want to talk about it, though. I'm still processing the news. And my dads are moving my therapist to our spare room later this afternoon. All I can know is that I'm not going anywhere, and I've chosen a Lady Gaga look that expresses the longing for a childhood I was deprived of.

 

Britanny : You look terrible. I look awesome.

 

Mercedes : I think it's the Kermit – the - Frog look.

 

Kurt : And we have a jumper.

 

Rachel : Well, my dads can't sew, so these are just stapled on.

 

Will : Guys, why don't we worry about this later, and maybe try to focus on the song?

 

Rachel : Couldn't agree more. Hit it!

 

Bad Romance

 

Mike Matt and Will applause, Finn Artie and Puck don't look so optimistic but they still applause

 

Will : All right!

 

Scene 8 - Boys Bathroom – Finn, Azimio and Karofsky

 

Finn is drawing a lighter on his face with a Kohl crayon but Azimio and Karofsky come out from the toilet and caught him with the make up on his face

 

Karofsky : What up, Finn?

 

Azimio : What's that on your face ? You got a bad pimple or something?

 

Karofsky : A Finn-ple?

Azimio and Karofsky laugh

 

Karofsky : Dude, are you wearing makeup ?

 

Azimio : I knew it was contagious. You moved in with that little Kurt kid, and now you got a bad case of the gay.

 

Finn : It's just something for Glee Club, all right ?

 

Karofsky : Oh, well, then it's (He pushes Finn back) definitely not gay, huh ?

 

Finn (pushing him back) : Get out of my way !

 

Azimio : Man, how many times do we got go through this ? ! You being a jock and being in this Glee Club does not make you versatile. It makes you bisexual.

 

Karofsky : And if we have to kick your ass to make you understand that, then our schedules are wide open.

 

Azimio : Get out of my bathroom. You girls, y'all belong across the hallway. Glee boy !

 

Karofsky laughs and they both get out of the bathroom leaving Finn ashamed. He sighs

 

Scene 9 - Carmel High Auditorium - Vocal Adrenaline, Shelby and Rachel

 

Intrumental version of Bad Romance is playing while Vocal Adrenaline is dancing dressed in red satin queen costume. The music stops. Rachel is watching them wearing an horrible blanket with sleeves.

 

Shelby : Yeah, that's better, guys. Take five. And, ladies, I don't want to hear about chafing just because you're being forced to wear metal underwear. Not my problem.

 

Rachel : Mom ?

 

Shelby : Honey, you gotta stop sneaking into these rehearsals.

 

Rachel : It's kind of important. (She opens her blanket revealing her Lady Gaga's outfit)

 

Shelby : Oh, dear God.

 

Rachel : My dads can't sew. I really need a mom right now. Do you think you can help ?

 

Scene 10 - MMHS Auditorium - Glee Club and Mr Schue

 

The girls and Kurt are sitting in the bleachers waiting for the guys to show up their theatricality

Rachel : Sorry I'm late.

 

Mercedes : Whoa, looking good, Rachel !

 

Rachel : Thanks. My mom made it.

 

Britanny (in the background) : Very nice.

 

Will : Well, we're all here, so without further ado, I'd like to introduce The Boys!

 

Artie (from the backstadge) : Lima, Ohio, get ready to rock !

 

Girls laugh and cheer the boys as if they were rockstars.

 

Shout It Out

 

Will : All right, guys, very impressive. Very, very... loud. (chuckles). But what, uh, what does that performance express ? And what do those costumes illustrate ?

 

Mike : We did our research, Mr. Shue.

 

Puck : Yeah, Finn's demon look is because Gene Simmons liked comic books as a kid,

and they called Paul Stanley the "Star Child" because he was a romantic or something. But that doesn't really explain my whore lips.

 

Artie : And my Ace Frehley is supposed to be a spaceman from another planet. Mike's iconic catman is because Peter Criss claimed to have nine lives.

 

Matt : Yeah, and I'm dressed as the guy who replaced Artie when he quits.

 

Will : Well, congratulations, guys. Job well done. Let's give it up for the boys !

 

The girls all cheer them up.

 

Scene 11- Corridor – Kurt, Tina, Azimio and Karofsky

 

Kurt : I thought the boy's KISS number was good, although the lyrics did leave something to be desired.

 

Tina : And Finn kept sticking his tongue out and I couldn't stop picturing him licking stuff. It was disturbing.

 

They're stopped on their way by Karofsky and Azimio looking angry because of the Gaga's clothes that Kurt and Tina are still wearing.

 

Karofsky : We warned you.

 

Azimio : Now Gaga's got to go.

 

Kurt and now Finn's room too - Kurt and Finn

 

Lady Gaga's Speachless is playing in the background

 

Kurt : Could you have a word with Azimio and Karofsky about harassing me without

damaging my Gaga outfit ?

 

Finn : Are you serious ? Do you know how difficult it is with those guys ? They already think we're boyfriends.

 

Kurt : Let them think what they want. They're Neanderthals. In three years, they'll be cleaning my septic tank.

 

Finn : Don't you get it ? It's not just them. We live in Ohio - not New York or San Francisco or some other city where people eat vegetables that aren't fried. I don't understand why you always need to make such a big spectacle of yourself. Why can't you just work harder at blending in?

 

Kurt : I'm sure that'd be easier for you.

 

Finn : You know, it would.

 

Finn tries to get his Kiss makeup off his face but he doesn't succeed. Kurt comes to help him.

 

Kurt : You are such a boy. You're going to have to use a moist towelette if you want to get that makeup off.

 

He begins to touch Finn's cheek with the towelette but Finn doesn't react very well.

 

Finn : Don't touch me!

 

Kurt : What is your problem, Finn ? It's just a moist towelette !

 

Finn : I'm gonna finish in the laundry room.

 

Kurt : Grow up, Finn !

He kicks in the boudoir chair.

 

Scene 12 - Will's Office - Shelby and Will

 

Shelby : I know why you called, and don't worry about it. My reconnection with Rachel is not some kind of plot to mess with you guys before regionals.

 

Will : I'm not worried about regionals. It's Rachel. She's special. She's got all of the best of you. She's strong-willed, dramatic, wildly talented.

 

Shelby : Go on.

 

Will : But she's not hard like you. She's fragile. Over-emotional. And she's clearly convinced herself that you are as committed to this reunion as she is. And I don't think you are. You're not prepared to have a teenage daughter. Are you ?

 

Shelby : I can't have any more kids. There were issues a few years back. Then some surgery, and that's that. I really wanted a daughter. That's why it was so important to me to make that bond with her. But you're right. I wanted my baby back. Rachel's an adult now. She doesn't need me.

 

Will : Shelby, I can't tell you what to do... But if you really love her, you have to tell her what you just told me.

 

Scene 13 - Kurt and Finn's Room redecorated by Kurt – Kurt, Finn and Burt

 

Kurt : I had to skip school to finish it, but I think you're really going to like it. Consider it a peace offering after all the yelling that we've been doing. I used Marlene Dietrich

and Gary Cooper in Morocco as my inspiration. It's a perfect blend of the masculine

and the feminine; the muted and the theatrical.

 

Finn : Are you freaking insane ? I can't live here. I'm a dude. (pointing the folding-screen) What the hell is that supposed to be ?

 

Kurt : It's a privacy partition. It's all I could find on such short notice. Why are you getting angry about everything ? I worked hard on this.

 

Finn (yelling at him) : That's not a privacy partition ! Why is it so hard for you to understand ? I don't want to get dressed in front of you ! Do you know that I put my underwear on in the shower before I come out when you're around ? I just... I don't want to have to worry about that kind of stuff in my own room, man.

 

Kurt (hurting) : And what stuff are you referring to?

 

Finn : You know. You know what I'm talking about. Don't play dumb. Why can't you just accept that I'm not like you ?

 

Kurt :I have accepted that.

 

Finn (sounding kind) : No, you haven't. You think I don't see the way you stare at me ? How flirty you get. You think I don't know why you got so excited that we were going to be moving in together?

 

Kurt (getting angry at Finn) :It's just a room, Finn ! We can redecorate it if you want to!

 

Finn (playing unfair with Kurt and getting angry at him) : Okay, good. Well, then the first thing that needs to go is that faggy lamp. And then we need to get rid of this faggy couch cover...

 

Burt (coming down to Finn because he heard him yelling at Kurt) : Hey ! What did you just call him?

 

Finn (looking guilty) : Oh, no, no, I didn't call him anything.I was talking to the blanket.

 

Burt : If you use that word, you're talking about him.

 

Kurt (defending Finn) : Relax, Dad. I didn't take it that way.

 

Burt : Yeah, that's because you're 16 and you still assume the best in people. You live a few years, you start seeing the hate in people's hearts. Even the best people. You use the "N" word?

 

Finn : Of course not.

 

Burt : How about "retard" ? You call that nice girl in Cheerios ! With Kurt, you call her a retard?

 

Finn : Becky-- no. She's my friend. She's got Down syndrome. I'd never call her that. That's cruel.

 

Burt : But you think it's okay to come into my house and say "faggy" ?

 

Finn : That's not what I meant...

 

Burt : I know what you meant ! What, you think I didn't use that word when I was your age ? You know, some kid gets clocked in practice, we'd tell him to stop being such a fag. Shake it off. We meant it exactly the way you meant it. That being gay is wrong. That it's some kind of punishable offense. I really thought you were different, Finn. You know, I thought that being in Glee Club and being raised by your mom meant that you were some, you know, new generation of dude who saw things differently. Who just kind of, you know, came into the world knowing what has taken me years of struggling to figure out. I guess I was wrong. I'm sorry, Finn, but you can't... you can't stay here.

 

Kurt (crying) :Dad.

 

Burt : I love your mom. And maybe this is going to cost me her,but my family comes first. I can't have that kind of poison around. This is our home, Kurt. He is my son. Out in the world, you do what you want, but not under my roof.

 

Finn leaves the place,speechless

 

Burt : The place looks great.

 

He puts a hand on Kurt's shoulder who's still crying and goes upstairs .Kurt sits on the couch.

 

Scene 14 - Choir Room - The Glee Club and Will

 

Kurt : You look like you should be in orbit.

 

Tina : My balls keep fallinoff.

 

Kurt : I've been there. (He looks at Finn with anger)

 

Finn (whispering to Kurt) : I want to talk about this.

 

Kurt (whispering back to him with arrogance) : There's not much to say. I feel sorry for you. I thought you were different.

 

Finn : I am different.

 

They are cutting off in their talk by M.Schue.

 

Will : All right, let's get things started.

 

Puck : Mr. Shue. There's something I want to say to Quinn. And I want everybody to hear it.

 

Will : All right.

 

Puck (walking into the room) : At first I didn't really get this theatrical assignment, being larger than life and putting it all out there,'cause I'm kind

of like that all the time. That's how my dad was, too. He was too busy being all crazy and rock and roll to be there for his kid. And you know what ? I didn't care that my dad was a badass. I just wanted him to be there. And he never was. And then I learned all this KISS stuff and while Jackie Daniels is a great name for like a powerboat or something, it's not right for a baby girl. So if my KISS mates will help me out, I got a better idea. Grab a stool, guys.

 

Beth

 

Puck (to Quinn) : I know you're giving her up, but before you do, I think you should name her Beth. If you'll let me, I'd really like to be there when she's born. I'd really like to meet her.

 

Quinn nods with tears in her eyes.

 

Scene 15 - WMHS Auditorium – Rachel, Shelby and Brad

 

Shelby : So, how'd your dads come up with the name "Rachel"?

 

Rachel : They were, um, big Friends fans. I know why you're here... to say good-bye.

 

Shelby : I really wanted this to work. Do you know what really turned me ? That story that you told me about your dads, and how they'd bring you water when you were sad. We're never gonna have anything like that. It's too late for us. I just think that anything we share right now is gonna be confusing for you.

 

Rachel : I just don't understand. You're my mom. I feel awful right now, and I should want to just fall into your arms and let you rock me and tell me everything is gonna be fine, but... I just don't feel it.

 

Shelby : It's because I'm your mother, but I'm not your mom.

 

Rachel : So what ? Do we just pretend we don't know each other now ?

 

Shelby : That seems silly. Let's just be grateful for one another... from afar. For a while. Don't think for a second I'm gonna go soft on you during regionals.

 

Rachel (sniffles) : Bring it. (chuckles)

 

Shelby : Can I have a hug good-bye ?

Rachel : Sure. (sniffles)

 

Shelby : Can you do me one more favor ? Sometime when you're thirsty... (She's taking a package off of her bag and opens it. It contains a gold star water cup.) Can you get yourself some water from this cup ? Gold stars are kinda my thing.

 

Rachel : Of course. (chuckles) Shelby... before you go, will... will you sing with me ?Just one time. It's sort of a fantasy of mine, and it would really mean a lot to me.

 

Shelby : I would be honored.

 

Rachel : Brad ! (whispering to Shelby) He's always just around. (Brad sits on the piano couch and Rachel gives him some scores) Um, take that. Here you go.(chuckles)

 

Poker Face

 

Shelby : You are really, really good.

 

Shelby leaves Rachel sad with the gold star cup.

 

Scene 16 - Choir Room - The Glee Club, Will, Azimio and Karofsky

 

Will : Whoa ! Guys, why are you all in your theatricality costumes?

 

Artie : It's the end of the week. We were kinda hoping to learn what the lesson of the assignment was.

 

Will : Well, um... You guys have had some great numbers this week, but I'm not totally sure that I know either.

 

They all laugh.

 

Tina (coming into the room in her Gothic clothes) : I do. I refuse to dress like somebody I'm not to be somebody I'm not. And I learned it's good to be a little theatrical.

 

Flash Back :School Corridor - Tina and Figgins

 

Figgins is going home but runs into Tina who's dressed like a vampire.

 

Tina : So here's what's going to happen. My dad - he's the king of the vampires. And Asian vampires are the most vicious of all the vampires. You're going to let me wear my lady demon clothes, or my dad will fly into your bedroom and bite your face off. He's really pissed. Is that what you want ?

 

Figgins : No, I don't want that. I'm afraid.

 

Tina : Good. I'm glad we had this talk. Now I have to go back to my coffin because the light is burning my eyes !

End of Flash Back

 

All the members of the Glee Club applause and cheer Tina.

 

Will : There she is.

 

Artie : Wait. Where's Kurt ? And where's Finn ?

 

Azimio and Karofsky are holding back Kurt against the corridor wall.

 

Kurt : Fine. You want to hit me ? You want to beat me up ? Go ahead. But I swear to you. I will never change. I'm proud to be different.I t's the best thing about me. So go ahead, hit me.

 

Azimio : I believe I will. (To Karofsky) Sir, would you like to go first ?

 

Finn : You're not hitting anyone.

 

Kurt : Oh, my God.

 

Azimio : Is he wearing a red rubber dress or am I trippin' ?

 

Finn : I want to thank you, Kurt. I realize I still have a lot to learn, but the reason I'm here right now... In a shower curtain,is... Because of you. And I'm not going to let anyone lay a hand on you.

 

Karofsky : (chuckles) Oh, really, dude ? 'Cause I'm pretty sure we can take both of you.

 

Puck (following by all the Glee Club) :Yeah ? But can you take all of us ?

 

Azimio : Okay. Okay, I get it. I took biology. You know what, Karofsky ? We done disturbed the freak hive. The worker freaks is trying to protect the queen freak.

 

Karofsky : Next time... We'll bring some friends, too.

 

They both leave.

 

Rachel : I'm tired of everyone calling us freaks.

 

Mercedes : Take a look at us. We are freaks.

 

They all laugh.

 

Finn : But we're all freaks together. (He looks at Kurt that joins them and responds to the smile his almosh brother gives him) And we shouldn't have to hide it.

 

Will (clapping) : Nice job, Finn. I think you just figured out what the lesson was. Kinda makes me wish I had planned it. But Mercedes is right, you do all look incredibly insane.

 

All the Gleeks : Thank you. Thank you.

 

Will : You're so welcome. Anyways, let's get back to work before you're all forced to join the circus. Next stop ? Regionals.

 

They all get back to the choir room and Kurt and Finn congratulate each other for their Lady Gaga's outfit.

 

End